it's a...

GIRL!

The ultrasound tech wasn't as sure because the baby was in a very modest position, but after I walked around a bit and then the doctor checked, the position was much better. He said definitely girl.

Wow is all I can say. I think I'm a little nervous for what is ahead of me. With Levi, I felt completely unprepared to care for and raise a little boy. But as life progressed and we found our way, I discovered more and more joys of what it means to be a mother to a little boy. It's like unwrapping a whole bunch of presents that you didn't expect. Things like how adorable it is to see a little boy with his daddy, or to see him holding onto his doggie's leash. Advantages like being able to say things like "oh, you're such a boy" when he does something gross that I'm sure both girl and boy babies do.

But with a girl, I've always wanted a girl and saw myself with a teenage daughter, shopping at the mall with her, baking cookies together, and doing all the mother-daughter bonding that my own mother and I have done. Now that it's almost a reality, I wonder how reality will measure up to my expectations. Does that make sense? I feel like I have pictured a reality for her that I didn't picture for Levi, which could potentially set myself up for disappointment. Isn't it crazy the ways we find things to worry about!?

Silly worries aside, I'm thrilled to find out this baby girl is growing and healthy. Already I feel like she's different than her brother. She doesn't demand that I eat an entire house worth of food each day. She doesn't kick me when I draw my legs up. Rather, she waits until I'm stretched out and quiet, laying still. Oh, and I think she requires more, eh hm, maternal fat stores as they call them since my weight gain has been a lot steadier than with Levi.

I don't know what she'll look like. If she'll have my brown eyes or Andy's blue. Will she be bald as a cue ball for her first year, or come out looking like I did with a mass of dark brown hair? Will she be more of a snuggler than Levi was? I don't know yet, but I do know I already love her.